This is iT...

I never know......

I always thought that way. Whatever I thought I'm until today...
My best mate, Actually dislikes a lot of stuff about mine.
I'm actually kinda can't accept the truth about this to be honest. I always claims that he is 1 of my best mate ever I met in my life but in exact, I actually did so much thing that so annoys to him,
I have no words to say about it. Even a thousand sorry also can't help about the bad that I did.

Sometimes I do feel like just go back home and end all this bullshit, I did thought I should stay here for a longer period since I know a couple of good friend here but seems like, I'm actually a terrible friend.

Kinda feel like just wanted to kill myself, but nah, not that stupid to end my life. Guess nothing else I can do to rescue what I've done. Even a sorry can't really help much on the stuff that I've done.

Hope time can bleach this all away but there is still a scar will left in my memory as a warning next time.
I don't blame anything but myself.

This is iT...

Why am I So Pathetic???

I never had this thought in my life ever before but sometimes I'm really think about ending my life!!!!
Isn't that's because of this Depression's Symptom??

This is iT...

Oh god. Just took a Depression Test and this is my result :SSSSSS

Major Depression: High-Moderate

Dysthymia: Slight-Moderate

Bipolar Disorder: High-Moderate

Cyclothymia: Very High

Seasonal Affective Disorder: High

Postpartum Depression: N/A

http://www.depressedtest.com/

I'm kinda worry. hahahaha. :S

This is iT...

Complicated feelings day....

Not sure if it's too much going on or it's because of nothing is going on here. Just don't feel alright today..
Moody again. Seriously, I'm gonna be a serious moody man soon, or I'm already otw being that.

Bad choices when you approved your parent's friend request on facebook when you had a drinking problem. They been stalking me for a while and today, I'm decided to blocked them. Sorry for that parent but seriously, I'm an adult now and I'll go on with my life, Stop acting like I'm still some 7 years old boy.

Recently also bit fed up with girl's behavior. An immature 1, been keep acting like "Oh, you are such a good friend, Can we be Best friend??" Seriously, sometimes people just have to cut the crap and straight to the point. What you want from me?

I been realize I'm being over nice person, and people just keep on looking advantages from me. I knows it, just that i keep silent all the time and I don't want to ruins the friendship, but seriously, when I need help, Where the fuck you guys go??? I tried so hard, to join the people here, everyone just looking for a party's mate not a trouble mate. When you have trouble, just fuck off.

I really fed up with my life in here. Depress me so much.

This is iT...

Hey, How's it going?

To be honest, i don't even know if anyone still Blogging and is anyone there actually still click on my blog whenever they are bored. Well, neither do I since i never visit my own blog for ages.

So, How things going guys? Been asking this question by my mates back in Malaysia most of the time: "When are you coming back?"
Not trying to be mean and I really appreciate all the regards you guys gave to me and I do miss you all. But really stop asking every single time. hahaha, it's pretty annoys me cause I'm not going back anytime soon which is kinda upset me as well. D:

Update about my life? I'm still in ma Summer Holiday, Which is seriously killing me!!!
Summer holiday in Scotland doesn't make you feel like "Summer" at all because it's fucking raining all the time and the Sun been hiding so much behind the cloud.
Mates are all far away and busy going on with their life but me, Still the same old me. Lazy, free, little bastard. I'm basically just hanging around everyday and do nothing!!!
Which is quiet upset, about myself, my life, Hopefully my parents as well. Hah!!
Yehh, I know, apparently from my facebook i've been drinking a lot here, but seriously, sometimes it wasn't that fun because I'm really feel so bored!!! Just I dont have any picture to upload for that! haha..

I really miss my holiday back in Malaysia last time, Had so much fun everyday and have so many different things to do there!!!

So, To all my friend back there. I loves you all! HEHE! Stay tunned (If you are actually reading my blog! LOL)
Bye guys.

This is iT...

我累了，闷了，也开始厌倦了。。。

This is iT...

Good Job my Nap, Now I would able to sleep later night...

So life moving on... How's life going people? Having fun in working life?
Was talking with my mate, that he enlighten me some point, in term on keep on bitching about your group project, why don't just stand up and ask them to give you something to do? Yes I did, but not like, Do you have anything for me to do?
is Well, you have to give me something to do!!! "I'm not even kidding" that's what he said. Haha

It's true, all this life, I only being bitchy and complaining about stuff that I'm not comfortable with. Just like this group project. I been hiding for so long, keep silent all the time. This sentences by my mate was stucked in my head for few days, I keep on thinking about it.
In my entire life until now, I'm behave like that, for lot of the time. I just don't man up, and speak.

Also, sometimes I know that I'm being negative too much, Just the way I think.
Is like, while my mate is playing game without me and with other people. I was think that maybe because I'm noob, if I join them I'm gonna ruin his game :/ better let him play with them so that they could win.
But i do know sometimes I just have to speak up and not just waiting until him to invite me to play. Still, sometimes I feel like don't want them to lose, that's why I rather play alone. Haha, but playing alone is freaking bored, you know? that feeling.
Yeah, guess I really can't always stay in the house alone, cause I am just being too negative and think about something that's kinda ridiculous sometimes. For example, I'm a lonely man on a lonely island and no one cares about me eating any piece of shit. Haha

Anyway. End of story.